10 Tips To Be A Better Helpmate

Getting married is the easy part, staying happily married without compromising parts of your self is where the work is at.

Women are designed to be helpmates for their spouses. The pressures of life and expectations of society can take the joy out of this role.

Below are a few tips to be a better helpmate and enjoy your role:

1) Know who you are


It is crucial for every woman to know who she is as an individual; outside her career and marriage because these things can fade away.

Figure out the source of your worth, self esteem and always keep it in mind. Do not be defined by what you do or don’t do; or what people think or don’t think about you.

2) Know your role in your home


There are various roles that the society expects a wife to play. These set roles vary from community to community. Subscribing to them can satisfy or distress you.

Knowing and understanding the role that God needs you to play in your home is the most important thing. This will determine your attitude; and attitude is everything

3) Love more


The world is a cold, dark place. It is cruel to say the least. The warmth of  love can make a big difference in a home.

1st Corinthians 13 breaks down love into practical points. Be more patient, kind, humble, polite, forgiving, hopeful and resilient.

It sounds easier said than done, aye? But God’s grace is sufficient.

4) Complain less


Negative energy drains. Constant nagging and complaining have negative effects on the atmosphere in the home.

If you have a concern, raise it at the right time; acknowledge the role that you have played in the situation and be open for a solution. If you feel you are still not being heard by your spouse, refer to tip 8 and 9.

5) Know when to reserve your comment


The truth is, not every thought that you think needs to be said aloud. Words once spoken cannot be taken back. Those spoken in anger have a way of replaying themselves in the mind of the recipient long after they’ve been uttered. Sometimes silence is more effective.

6) Offer Help


Some people find it difficult to ask for help, mainly because it may be viewed as a sign of weakness. Sometimes they feel like they are bothering the other person.

Offer to help your spouse, they may refuse the first time depending on their personality or the circumstances surrounding them. After a while, they will feel comfortable to ask for help because they know that you are available to help.

7) Be Teachable


When your spouse asks you to help them do not minimize or trivialize their need. Serve wholly. Do it cheerfully without a look of pain on your face. It may not seem like much to you, but it is to the other person. Be willing to learn on the job, granted you don’t know everything, but don’t let your inability become a disability. Ask questions, learn, love and laugh.

8) Listen to your Helper


In John chapter 14 Jesus said that He was leaving us a helper, the Holy Spirit. Sadly, He is one of the most underutilized and recognized aspects of God.

Ask the Holyspirit for guidance and insight then listen. It is one thing to ask and another to listen. The truth is sometimes your spouse may not know how exactly they want to be helped, the Holy Spirit can give you divine ideas at such times.

9) Pray


Pray for your spouse and your marriage.  Prayer changes things. Talking to God is never a waste of time or saliva.

Battles are fought and won on your knees. Speak life into situations and call on the heavens for breakthrough. Then watch the Lord display His power in situations, all for the glory of His name.

10) Enjoy the journey


Purpose to love and laugh each day, make memories and dwell on the positive. Don’t repeat mistakes but learn from them. Embrace the seasons of life and grow together. By God’s grace, forgive your spouse and invite God to renew the joy and love in your home.

Serve your husband with joy. When you feel stretched emotionally and physically fall back on your source. Talk to God and hear His heart’s desire for your marriage and home.




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