Morning Reflections: Remain Fluid, Always

The ocean is my happy place. When I moved to Mombasa, I used to wonder how and why the people who lived here didn’t frequent the ocean. Then I got comfortable, became one of ‘them’, my ‘let’s go to the ocean’ plans became sparse. I guess after a few months, it became the norm, sort of like Uhuru park 🙂

Yesterday morning, I went for a walk on the beach and I was just so blown away. It was so nostalgic! Reminded me of the love that I had for God when I moved to Mombasa. Please don’t get me wrong, I still love Jesus. Though life was different then. But I was reminded to remain fluid regardless of the season in life. To always be available for the Spirit of the Lord to blow me in the direction that he pleases. Having the waves crash at my feet was an example of what He can do with a fluid heart.

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I left so recharged and in awe of God. I kept singing this song.

Oh that I will search for Him and find Him, everyday, in the big things and the little things.

We serve a big God!! He deserves all of our praise. May our life songs sing to Him.  Standing by the ocean humbled me. My response was YES! Yes, I will go where you send me, even across the fence, the nations and oceans. Obedience begins where I’m at, it’s not a destination but a state of being.

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Here’s to many more walks by the ocean, many refreshing reflections and an irresistible love for Jesus that oozes into every part of my life.

Remain Fluid, Always!

Blessings,

Bibi2be

Another Chance To Get It Right

I didn’t know the power of coffee until I became a mother of an energetic toddler. The term ‘morning person’ was redefined; I always imagined that I was a morning person, but my energy levels paled in comparison to Ksena’s. She wakes up ready to take on the world. Her booting phase takes all of ten minutes max and then the stories begin. Some days she would wake up as the sun peeked out of the clouds and I was still asleep in my head. My train of thought was not yet up and running.

courtesy of commons.wikemedia.org

courtesy of commons.wikemedia.org

Coffee became my crutch. Only after I could see the bottom of my cup of coffee, could I fully function. Coffee helped me truly wake up and be normal; it kicked miss cranky pants out. Anytime before coffee o’clock I was somewhat sleep walking as I tried to keep up with conversation and hurriedly make breakfast. It got to a place that I had to stop drinking the coffee, well, I realized that it wasn’t really helping my estrogen levels and also I had an unhealthy relationship with it.

So I stopped drinking coffee. The first couple of days were a blur. I’d properly wake up four hours into the day, and my energy levels were suffering. I had to find a substitute. I started having Apple Cider Vinegar in water in the morning which really helped with my energy levels, but before that, I started praying and asking God to help me. To carry me and strengthen me.

I won’t lie, sometimes I still crave a cup of coffee but I have learned that it cannot be my lifeline or shortcut. Only Jesus can energize me and give me mental clarity that lasts the whole day.

So I say, in the morning when I rise, give me Jesus and all day too.

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Some nights I go to bed, beating myself up, because sheer exhaustion is not the best lens to examine yourself by. A few days ago, as I reflected on the day that was, I realized I hadn’t gotten a chance to do everything that I would have liked, to give as many cuddles as I’d have liked [also, because cuddling an extremely active toddler can be a wee bit difficult ] and it made me sad. I have an idea of what being a ‘perfect mum’ looks like but there are so many days that I fall short.

As I settled into bed, this quote caught my eye:

‘Being a perfect parent doesn’t matter. Being a praying parent does.’ Stormie Omartian

Sometimes I am so stuck on perfection that I forget to pray more. Yet prayer is what matters.

This morning, I am thankful for another chance to get it right. A chance to love God above all else, love my family, live in purpose and pray more.

Have a wonderful day.

Blessings,

Bibi2be

The Children Agenda

Every time I put on cartoon stations, I realize that the world has an agenda for our children. Genies, charms, demons, spirits and witches are the order of the day. Seemingly innocent cartoon characters are looking to other spirits for assistance in every day tasks. My spirit is usually so disturbed; what happened to a cartoon being just that. Nowadays, I even find Tom & Jerry violent 🙂 when your trying to teach a toddler that hitting is not good, you have a ‘violence’ radar that goes on.

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The Holy Spirit is real. He longs to walk with us and have a relationship with our children. For this to happen we need to be intentional about bringing them to spaces where they hear the word of God and experience His power.

If I don’t teach Ksena to love Jesus the world will teach her not to. It may not tell her not to love Him, instead it will show her other things to love instead. It’s so exciting that she can now verbally recall things from memory, she’s been telling us things that happened months ago. She is ripe for memory verses. I’ll put a list of the verses we are starting with and I can share them in a few days.

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A few days ago,we taught her to say God bless you, she randomly walks up to us and says “Mummy/Daddy God bless you”. Our words have power, we are teaching her to bless and not curse.

 

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Parenting is a full time job. Training up a child is a lot of work, but we have a helper who was present when the child was being knit in the womb. We should let Him guide us and lead us.

I’d love to hear how you are teaching your children about Jesus.

There are only so many nursery rhymes you can listen to without having them as a soundtrack in your dreams :). If you could please list some (clean) cartoons that we can check out in the next couple of months, I’d be so grateful.

Blessings,

Bibi2be

 

By His Grace, For His Glory

AND..I’M…BACK!!!!!! (: (: (:

It is so good to write again, it feels like it’s been too long since I last posted. I’ve been in a wedding zone, two of my friends of mine got married in the last two weeks. It’s been interesting watching them journey to the aisle. It was quite nostalgic, plus, we celebrated our 4th anniversary last week 🙂 . It’s been a short long time. I remember the wedding day vividly, it’s amazing how much we’ve changed since. We’ve both grown as individuals and in our roles as well.

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As I’ve reflected on marriage the last couple of weeks as I’ve engaged in different conversations about marriage, weddings and relationships, I’ve found this statement to be the best summary of our union.

‘By His Grace, for His glory!!!’

We are married in a time where the world doesn’t honor and respect the institution of marriage. Being happily married is honestly a miracle. By God’s grace we are. We’ve seen God carry us, sustain us, fulfill us and love on us. It is His Grace that has brought us this far, for His glory. There are many marriage practices and theories that people attribute to a happy marriage, but I can boldly say that without God you still remain void. It is He who holds us together [Colossians 1:17] By now you’ve figured that I absolutely love this verse. It is a lifeline for me.


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Marriage works, with Jesus it does. We used to wonder out loud a few years ago that if marriage with God in it has its challenges, what about marriage without Him? Quite frankly, I am still not interested in finding out how it works without Him (: .

If you have given up hope on marriages in our generation, please be encouraged, a remnant of God’s grace remains, for His glory.

My heart has been so heavy for marriages the last couple of days, as I have been praying this song has been my prayer.

If your marriage is in a dark place that has discouraged you and made you doubt God, I pray that you will experience God’s divine peace. Oh that the Spirit of the Lord will break out and break down every wall down. Every wall that has boxed you in and held you captive. May revival come, His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven. There is nothing too difficult for God. No situation too dark or bleak for Him. He is God.

If you would like me to stand with you in prayer, please send me an email via ess@bibi2be.com and we’ll trust God together.

Blessings,

Bibi2be

 

 

 

I Couldn’t Save Him

I have been so overwhelmed by the love that I have received since I posted  5 years on… Grief. Acceptance. Life . Thank you!!

One of the things that I really struggled with the days following my dad passing away was the fact that I couldn’t save him. A part of me felt so worthless, hopeless and defeated. My Psychology degree in the making was not fireproof. I was not a hero with a big ‘S’ on my chest. I was a broken, disappointed, confused victim in this story.

I prided myself in having a special relationship with my dad. I loved him so much. I thought that I would always be prepared for the day he died. Boy, was I extremely far from the truth. Death has a way sneaking up on you and knocking the wind out of your chest; then as you choke on the ground, it slowly but surely yanks away the physical presence of the one that you love . And you lay there, powerless. 

The days leading up to his death, we would talk and I could see the hopelessness in his eyes. We talked and prayed together but it wasn’t enough. He needed someone to save him. I was not his savior. The truth is, nothing I could have done would ever have been enough to save him. I am not Jesus!

I am not Jesus! 

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I feel like I should say it again, I am not Jesus!!  Oh how I wish that the younger me understood this after dad died. I spent so many day moaning and mourning the fact that I had failed to stop it (as if I had a set of super powers only known to me.)I battled with feelings of guilt, a paralysis in my heart, I was afraid to ever walk with someone in the valley of depression. I doubted myself and my education, to an extent that I wasn’t sure I wanted to practice anytime soon. I was devastated.

I had prayed, I had cried, I had tried but it still was not enough. Only Jesus could save dad. My words and advice were good but not enough to do the work that only Jesus could.

Jesus did it at the cross. Because He died, I live. He is the perfect savior.

If you don’t know Jesus as your personal savior, my prayer is that you would heed His call today. Behold He stands at the door of your heart knocking, if you hear His voice, do let Him in. If you would like to please pray this prayer and believe in your heart.

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If you have prayed this prayer and accepted Jesus as your personal savior, Congratulations!! Please send me an email via ess@bibi2be.com and we can walk together.

For those walking with people in the valley of depression I pray that you will realize that there is only so much that you can do. Encourage them , love on them and lead them to Jesus, our savior. Only He can save them from the depths of the grave.

For those who have loved and lost, I pray that the Lord will continue to comfort you. I pray that this truth will enable you to forgive yourself. That you will let go of the guilt that has haunted you for weeks and walk free. You did your best, and it was enough.

Blessings,

Bibi2be

Peace is Our Default Setting.

A  friend of mine recently reminded me a life changing truth that made me re-evaluate how I start my day.

To me the beginning of the day determines the rest of the day. So I have rules: I never wake up in any anxiety, of absolutely anything: Money, no money, clean or dirty, done or not done. Nothing can raise my blood pressure of anxiety level in the morning. It took me years to get to this point, I had to get sick to get it. If there is anything that raises your heartbeat, remove it, try, make an attempt, make an effort, eventually, you will get there

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once you reach it you will breath deeper, your cortisol level will balance out, you will loose weight, your blood pressure will level out, you will be able to look at things from the distance, you will be able to see more, you will be able to enjoy your life and you will become better person over all. There is always tomorrow to clean the dishes, and if there is not, then not a big deal when you leave them dirty, but if the tomorrow is not there to make up for lost time with you or your loved once, the loss is greater.

As I read this, the Holy Spirit revealed to me that chaos is not my default setting, peace is. I need to learn how to value it above all else. There are things that increase anxiety in my life, and in turn disrupt my peace. But I need to realize that peace is valuable, peace is Jesus’ gift to me. It is my little piece of heaven on earth.

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Worry and anxiety do not produce good fruit. Peace is crucial for my overall well-being. How I  start my day has an impact on the rest of the day.

I have decided to take some time every morning and be still, not think about anything that causes me to worry, remind myself what peace feels like. And strive to maintain that state of being. In this moment, I remind myself and every situation that disrupts my peace by causing me to worry, that He is God.

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This means that, there is nothing too difficult for Him. He knit me in my mother’s womb, He knows all about me and loves me the same.

I refuse to let external forces disrupt my peace. Sometimes I fail at this, but I have a new found resolve to let the peace of God reign in my heart and mind. So, every time that I feel anxious I will remind myself that God longs for me to experience His peace that surpasses all understanding instead.

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What is it that causes you to feel out of balance?

Do you value peace over chaos?

This is my prayer for you:

May God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you his grace and peace. 2 Corinthians 1:2

Blessings,

Bibi2be

P.S I f you would like me to stand with you in prayer, send me an email via ess@bibi2be.com

Lessons From My Daughter (Pt 7)

Miss K is one year old, God is amazing!! It’s been a beautiful journey, we stand in awe of God.

She is always teaching us life changing lessons. This weeks are no different.

  • Learn Something New Everyday

Pretty lady is very vocal. She likes to talk and imitate what we are saying. In fact, she literally picks up a new word every day. A few days ago it was ‘this’ then, she even was able to use it together with another word. She said ‘this, lala’, as she pointed at me. We still have a long way to go in teaching her when and how the words are used, but for now, we are just amused and entertained by this milestone. We are celebrating the baby steps.

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I’ve been challenged to learn something new everyday even if it is one new word. So if you see some big words in the posts to come, know that my little girl influenced me (:

  •  Empathy

Miss K is a mushy little girl. She walks up to us and climbs our laps to give us hugs. Totally heart melting. A couple of days, my mummy was bereaved. She received the news when we were all together and she broke down. A few seconds later, Miss K broke down too. When they both finished crying, they were better A problem shared is a problem half solved. If a little on is able to empathize, how much more is the Lord of Lords.

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God’s heart breaks when my heart breaks. He feels my pain. He understands my struggles, He sympathizes and empathizes with me. Our God is great.

  • Jesus Must Be Seen

Ksena has a little nickname, ‘smiling/happy baby’. Her joy is evident. When people ask why she is so happy, we always say that it is the joy of the Lord. He is the one who gives joy. We cannot take credit for it.

Is God’s joy being seen in my life? I somehow feel like that should be a rhetoric question, BUT, on the real, sometimes I don’t think it is. This needs to change. My joy should not be dependent on circumstances but on God. And His joy should be my strength.

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I need to work on this one.

Have a lovely day,

Smiles and hearty laughs from the pretty lady,

Bibi2be